Well let's get back in the swing of things with an old favorite, dumb action figures! And it looks like Hasbro is in the middle of turning Spider-Man into the same type of crazy over the top lunatic as Action Figure Batman. Hasbro, I love ya, but... please just think about the implications your toys may have. Please.
Sword Attack Spider-Man
First up we have a costume not made for fighting. Obviously Peter was just going to Comic Con and decided to dress up as Scorpion. Huh. I never saw him as a Mortal Kombat fan, but to each his own.
Mega Arms Spider-Man
You know what they say: If you can't beat them, join them.
Although now that I look at it again, since Spideys wearing second mask I think he's turned to a life of crime and is trying to frame Dr Otto Octavius.
Also, the packige shows Spidey with the mask on upside-down:
Web Blast Spider-Man
I don't have much to say about this, but just look at it! Where does he keep it? How long does it take to set up? What what possible situation could he use this in? Where did he get it?
I jus- I-I, what?!
Let's move on. My head hurts.
Space Crusader Spider-Man
You know, because Spider-Man is always going into space. Elctro? Big intrest in space. The Rhino? He came from space! Kraven the Hunter? When is he not in space?
Umm, yeah, this is kind of dumb.
But not as dumb as the fact that this toy is just a repaint of 'Ocean Battle Spider-Man'
Because why bother making two suites? There's no air in water and there's no air in space. It's the same thing. Just slap on a new coat of paint and call it a day. What could go wrong?
Well that was fun. I'm Dollar Ben and I'll see you in September!
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